McCain, Romney, Huckabee Join Forces; Start a Band

Muscle Shoals, Alabama-  The Vitamin Press has just learned  that three former presidential hopefuls  – John “Sinister” McCain, Mittens “Mad Cow” Romney and Mike Huckabee – have placed their former ambitions behind them and united together for the greater purpose of healing the world with the psychedelic burn of their sweet, sweet rock-and-roll music.  This experiment in harmonic, synergistic fusion, the power of believing in the beauty of your dreams, and the unstoppable uniting force of their positive rock melodies has coalesced around these three musical troubadours and forged a sum that greatly exceeds the size of their parts. Alone, they were but men.  Together, they are RINO.

Lead singer and head axeman, John “No Shame in My Game” McCain, spoke to us about what this band means to him.  ”My friends, RINO, or Rehashing Ideas Nancy-Pelosi Outlined as we are sometimes known, is all about reaching across the aisle.  We aren’t afraid of playing to new fans – not even if it means there is no room left for some of the old ones.  You know, my friends, if my thirty years in public service have taught me anything, its that I would rather lose an election than the affection of the mainstream media. So keep on rockin’ in the partially free world… I mean . . . you know . . . while you still can.”

Catch RINO for yourself this fall as they tour Holiday Inn’s and Nursing Homes all across the country in support of their debut album License To Kim Jong Il.  Be sure to show up early, as you don’t want to miss their opening act, The Van Jonas Brothers featuring the talents of Dennis Kucinich, Howard Dean, and that former green jobs czar.